December 2011
151 posts
Awesome.
I feel like a truck hit me, I’m going to a party of strangers tonight, my hair has wilted, and I’ve already been called crazy and treated with kid gloves today.
The NYE luck keeps its tradition alive.
“Carson Daly and a ball dropping. There’s two images that should never be said in...”
– The NYE wisdom of Seth Cohen.
Good morning.
(via growingpangs)
It’s amazing that Seth Cohen encapsulated this holiday’s terribleness in two sentences in, like, 2002.
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2011 Books
I read more books this year than I have in any year previously, including when I worked at a pharmacy and devoured Nicholas Sparks and Gossip Girl books during my shifts. I’m happy with that, especially considering that a large portion of the books I read this summer were bar review books. (THANK GOD THAT’S DONE) I also discovered audiobooks, so over 10 of these were listened to on...
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2011 In Review
I had to bandwagon this because I actually had a pretty eventful year.
January: It was cold. I dunno. January’s the worst.
February: I got kidney surgery.
March: I turned 25. It sucked. I also did moot court in Brooklyn.
April: I saw Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark on Broadway. I 3Led a lot.
May: I saw How to Succeed on Broadway. I graduated from law school.
June: I studied for the...
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Anonymous asked: Is Lili your real name? Did you change the spelling?
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2012 Resolutions
Yes, I’m making New Year’s resolutions. I always make at least one and I always keep them, so don’t give me your guff.
Although I am feeling like Grimace right now, I have promised myself I will not make a resolution to lose weight. I never will.
Last year, my two resolutions were to stay in better touch with friends who don’t suck, and to read more. I focused a lot...
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Maybe I'd feel popular then.
Laura: is it still silent in chambers? Me: it is. it’s scary Me: i’m just working on this one damn tricky motion Laura: that does suck. i always think that i like to be alone but then you get weirded and kinda desperate to talk Me: oh yeah Me: like it’s nice to get work done Me: but even i’m getting lonely Laura: we could do a I am legend and populate the office with...
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Liz Lemon BLARGH status
This morning I traded cars with Chelsea - she’s taking mine in for an oil change. I go into my car to get my iPhone FM transmitter so I can listen to my book… and it snaps in half as I remove it from the cigarette lighter adapter.
I go to get Chelsea $10 of gas in cash to replenish what I’ll use today in my commute (and then some), and the guy rings me up for $20. I tell him I...
My Netflix Categories
Classic Witty Musicals (ding ding ding)
Goofy Classic TV Shows
Emotional 20th Century Period Pieces (oh dear god they’re right)
Quirky Disfunctional Family TV Dramas
Feel-Good Romantic Movies (duh)
Critically Acclaimed Gritty Suspenseful Movies
Inspiring Independent Dramas
Foreign Crime Action and Adventure
Sentimental Tearjerkers Featuring a Strong Female Lead (WOW this is creepily...
whiskeybentandhellbound asked: Tag, you’re it! Here are the rules: Each tagged person must post ten things about themselves. You have to choose and tag ten people. Go to their blogs and tell them you tagged them.
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“I hate everyone except my internet friends.”
– Me to Steph (via sasstacular)
True Life: Everyone Except My Tumblr Friends Gets a 2x4 to the Head.
(via haygirlhay)
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WHO HAS GCHAT AT WORK?!
I HAVE GCHAT AT WORK!
It’s because I have my laptop open, because zero fucks are to be had this week, but STILL. This is fantastic. I’m so lonely guys.
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And just like that...
Ten minutes and $57 later…
I’m on Weight Watchers again.
Time to get my shit in gear.
AND NO, I DON’T WANT TO WAIT UNTIL THE NEW YEAR. THE TIME IS NOW. I believe in myself. This is what’s worked for me before, and it’ll work again.
Let’s do this.
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So I'm just gonna get this off my chest
And I’ll warn you in advance that this is a major white whine.
This Christmas was a bust for me.
I got my hopes too high all around and everything I was expecting just sorta fell flat. There’s a lot of tension in my extended family right now, and all the togetherness felt forced. Plus I scaled back the presents for my mom because Chelsea was getting all upset about me having more...
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Oh hey!
Are we sharing embarrassing stories and pictures from Facebook timeline today?
I’m behind it. I owe you guys after my verbal vomit this morning. But since I expended a lot of mental and emotional energy on raging over my student loans and the highway robbery that is my pension plan (I KNOW I GET IT BACK BUT I NEED IT NOW), I’ll just leave you with this.
From senior week during...
umcanyounot asked: I like how you pay the government to work for them.
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What's the opposite of a Christmas bonus?
Is it a Christmas kick in the face? Because that’s what I got today.
Spoiler alert: I don’t make that much. I have a staggering amount of student loan debt to pay off and I work for the government. Almost a quarter of my pay was already going to paying down my student debt because I’m basically a glorified intern. I had a budget. It was fantastic.
Until this pay period,...
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I'm taking charge today
I hereby mandate that if you are at work, you shall not do work. We should not be at work today. This is ass. So think of Kunu. DO LESS.
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Cynic moment
Scroll on past if you’re gonna get burnt about me being a little bitchy.
My high school best friend (who unfortunately I don’t keep in close touch with because she started associating with the biggest bitch from our class while we were in college) got engaged last week. So OBVIOUSLY I stalked her on The Knot. It’s really cute and exciting - this is her college boyfriend, been...
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Warning:
Next week I am working. (BOO YOU WHORES) However, the only schmoes working in this entire courthouse are me and the two other law clerks. All three judges are gone, as well as their secretaries. Courts are closed.
I also have exactly one probate motion to do. Just ONE. All week. And I’ve already started it.
This means that, if you’re not working and won’t be on Tumblr,...
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Fell off the wagon
Have purchased EIGHT Kindle books in the last 48 hours. EIGHT.
Granted, they were all 99 cents except for 2 which were $2.99, but still.
Bumped by Megan McCafferty (I heard it’s not great, but I’m intrigued) Delirium by Lauren Oliver Graceling by Kristen Cashore Entwined by Heather Dixon The Poison Diaries by Maryrose Wood Unearthly by Cynthia Hand Withering Tights by Louise...
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Priorities. Or, Why Work Sucks
Me: so when do you start [your new job]?!?!
Sarah (whiskeybentandhellbound): jan 3
Sarah: so technically, my ass is on vaca
Me: wooooooooo
Me: YOUR DAYS OF FREEDOM ARE NUMBERED
Sarah: i know. pants. i'm not happy about it
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Nail polish problems
Maybe you can help me with one or all.
1. Judge’s secretary, in a very sweet gesture, gave me two OPI nail polishes that I already own: the base coat and Excuse Moi! from the Muppets collection. I’m sure the base coat is good (I use Zoya and I won’t switch for anything), and Excuse Moi! is a really pretty jelly magenta with lots of pink and white glitter. Does anyone want...
MAN that guy I hit was a douchebag.
Skeezeball and corporate sketchy. And his business card had Comic Sans on it. DON’T YOU READ THE INTERNET DUDE?!
All that being said, it’s over. Thank God. But I did want to do that fat girl crying when I handed over a check for $953. For a fucking bumper.
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Aw damnit
Had a busy day and a long lunch with a friend, so I was thinking it was a pretty quality day.
Until I realized that tonight I’m meeting the sketchy douchebag I rear-ended back in October at Starbucks to give him the money for the accident. (We went outside insurance so I didn’t end up DOUBLING my monthly premium for a tiny fender bender. You know how State Farm crows about accident...
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I told the head mediator I'd be back in a minute.
There’s exactly one case left to do. I’m not going back. I’ve dealt with enough crazies today.
Tee hee.
SMALL ACTS OF REBELLION!
In re: Sweater over button down
itwillalwaysb replied to your photo: GPOYW: The “I Think This Look Is Cute On Others…
I love that look but I feel like I’m in a straight jacket when I wear it.. Can’t move!
YES. My arms feel like I’m wearing six layers of clothes and I have about as much range of motion as an obese baby. I feel like this.
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Real-life Jurassic Park coming to New Jersey | IFC →
section9:
idneverwhisper:
staygoldenkeeks:
uncannie:
The new park, Field Station: Dinosaurs, will feature 31 life-sized, animatronic prehistoric animals that will be able to roam and interact with their surroundings.
Mark your calendars for May 26th in Secaucus!
As if I didn’t think Jersey was already the best place on Earth, they add DINOSAURS!!!!!
aka the only reason I’d ever go...
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Have you ever gotten to the point with someone
where EVERY SINGLE WORD that leaves their lips is so crazy that you actually can’t keep your jaw from going slack during a conversation with them? Where they are so deluded that you think they must actually be on really awesome drugs in order to be this detached from reality?
I have no idea how to deal with some people anymore. I’m approaching new levels of “you scare me with...
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Dear Job,
blairsings:
umcanyounot:
My productivity is at an all-time low this week.
Yes.
And my job DESERVES a Post-It copout.
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Today in "Um, what?!"
Judge’s secretary has nicknames for everyone. (She’s still on the “Lilipad” kick with me. I hate it more every time she says it. Thanks for diminishing my professional credibility, lady.) Everyone gets some sort of nickname. Hot Prosecutor is - I shit you not - Sugar Booger.
The worst one, though, is the judge. She calls him Judgey-Poo, which is bad enough on its...
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What's your favorite body lotion?
I love the plain Neutrogena Body Lotion (light sesame) but it’s not thick enough for winter. I need one that absorbs quickly and is still going to make my winter skin soft.
Also not for a million dollars.
I’ll bake you cookies if you suggest the winner.